.be happy for this moment.this moment is your life.

full of regret right now. and i really shouldn't be. i was just an idiot. it was within my grasp, and something kept me from hanging on. there is still hope. but i don't know if i have the strenght to wait. and trust. i'm torn. i've finally moved on fully. but not to anything. because i didn't do a certain thing. why? there has to be a reason. i just wish i knew now. i can't help wondering if it would have made a difference. either way it would have been out of my control. but then i wouldn't feel so lost. i would know i did what i could to push this in the right direction. but what if he didn't want it to be more than what it was. i just wish i could see him again. and see if it was just passion and need. or there is a chance for something more. apparently there might have been before. but what about now? hmmmm



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and on another note, if you haven't heard the song "The General" by dispatch - go listen to it now. my new fav.

p.s. is anyone out there still reading this? or am i just doing it for me now (not that is was for anyone else before...)