.be happy for this moment.this moment is your life.

I'm so...angry with myself. And yet, I have the ability to change it but i'm not. I could call him, i have the number, but its been freaking 3 weeks. if i had done it earlier maybe, but now i think it would just be more awkward, but on the other hand, i'll always regret it if i don't. I need some moral support if i call though. and then there's the whole going out for pizza thing, but i haven't heard anything, so i'm assuming thats not happening. and then i'll be in calgary for a month - and long-distance, if it was to even turn into something, and i don't really get along. but this time i might be able to make it work. i'll probably be super busy anyway..so many bloody projects. plus i have my girls to hang out with (woo kari and marnie...too its not all of us, but what can ya do?)...keep my mind off it. or just make me think about it constantly. FRICK...its not like i'm not doing that anyway. i can' t stop thinking about him, and playing that night over. why didn't i just freaking give him my number to begin with. ahhhhhhhhhhhh

and this isn't helping....he's probably moved on anyway - i just wish i knew